


5 Themes of Brotherhood

by DelicateRevelations



Category: Pacific Rim (2013)
Genre: Brotherhood, Family Drama, Gen, Non-Graphic Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-06
Updated: 2013-09-01
Packaged: 2017-12-22 15:32:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,284
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/914898
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DelicateRevelations/pseuds/DelicateRevelations
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Brothers can be best of friends, rivals and have the ability to hurt each other the most. Raleigh and Yancy are no different, but were lucky in the sense that the drift insured they came together instead of falling apart.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> My second foray into the Pacific Rim Fandom. I, myself am the middle child (And only girl) between two brothers. So a lot of the situations that play out here are somewhat similar to what I've observed about my own brothers. 
> 
> Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by Warner Bros Pictures and Legendary Pictures’ Pacific Rim. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.

* * *

_Our brothers and sisters are there with us from the dawn_

_of our personal stories to the inevitable dusk._

_\-- Susan Scarf Merrell_

 

* * *

 

Raleigh banged into the bunk he and his brother shared, finding quite a bit of satisfaction in kicking the door shut with an audible thud.

Just the sight of his and Yancy’s bunk beds made his anger simmer. It just wasn’t _fair._

He put the same amount of time into training as Yancy did, followed the same training regiment, and had the same teacher. Hell, they even ate the same food!

And, yet. Yet.

No matter what he did, how hard he tried, Yancy was always better.

Yancy was what they called a ‘Natural’. It only took him one try to get down a move, he had an innate understanding of the mechanics of the Jaegars and connected with them as simply as if he was typing on a keyboard.

It wasn’t that simple! Raleigh did everything he could just to keep up with his brother, and despite the fact that they were at the top of their class in the Academy he still felt he barely managed that.

Flopping stomach down on the lower bunk, Raleigh pulled the pillow over his head. He wasn’t _good enough_ , he couldn’t keep up with his prodigal brother.

He knew, and if he hadn’t he’d have learned soon enough based on the whispers from the other pilots, that the only reason he was here was because he and Yancy were extremely compatible.

And the worst part? The worst part was that Yancy didn’t see it. These days, even as they grew closer, Yancy kept a part of himself separate. Yancy didn't want to see it, have to deal with it because that would mean letting down his walls.

Yancy hadn’t always been this aloof or distant though.

Actually, when we were younger he was a tactile and out-going kid. But after the first Kaiju attack, after their mom died of cancer, it was like he’d retreated into himself.

It was slowly getting better, Yancy was letting some people in especially with Raleigh.

But whenever anyone brought up training, Raleigh’s lackluster scores or his tendency to deviate from the pre-planned tactics Yancy’s face was blank. Unreadable.

Oh, he never agreed with them. But he didn’t defend him either.

Raleigh knew it wasn’t anyone’s fault but his own. He wasn’t _strong enough,_ he was the bad egg, the let-down, the tag along brother.

He was distracted from his morose thoughts as someone else walked into the room. Raleigh listened as they shut the door, much gentler than he had, and held that position.

Mentally, Raleigh could picture Yancy. Right now he knew, without looking that Yancy was leaning his back against the door, arms crossed in front of his chest and with that damnable blank face.

“Raleigh?” Yancy asked, concerned by the sight in front of him.

It wasn’t in Raleigh’s nature to pout or sulk. He was usually so energetic that you couldn't get him to sit still without bribes or threats. Yancy couldn’t imagine what could have caused this reaction from his brother.

Raleigh grunted into his pillow, unwilling to look at Yancy. He, unlike his brother, did not possess an unreadable face.

All it would take was one look and Yancy would _know._ Know that Raleigh was being pathetic and pulling his own little pity party, something he hated in others.

He supposed that made him a bit of a hypocrite.

Raleigh’d always been of the mind that if there was something you didn’t like about yourself, change it. Don’t sit around bemoaning it.

The motto had never failed him before this.

Yancy rolled his eyes, and moved over to perch on the bed beside his younger brother. “You have to face me sometime, you know.”

Childishly, he would admit, Raleigh ignored him.

Sighing with exasperation, Yancy reached over and tugged the pillow out of Raleigh’s grip and threw it carelessly aside.

“Don’t make me roll you over too.” He threatened mildly.

Raleigh, however, knew when to cut his loses.

So (albeit reluctantly) Raleigh rolled over and faced his brother.

Arching an eyebrow Yancy gave Raleigh The Look. The one that said _Spill. Now._

“Nothing’s wrong,” Raleigh lied, “My simulation scores just weren’t what I wanted.”

Yancy stared.

Raleigh fidgeted.

“Anything else?”

“Nooooo... ?”

Yancy hummed, “You sure? I’ll find out when they have us drift next week.” He reminded him, alluding to the fact that next week they would be drifting for the first time, in real life with each other and not through a simulation.

When Raleigh still stubbornly remained silent, Yancy stood up.

He moved towards the door, “Well I was going to offer to show you some tricks with the simulator to cheer you up… but if nothing’s wrong I guess I’ll just go get dinner.” Yancy sighed dramatically, reaching for the handle of the door in slow motion.

His hand was on the handle, he was opening the door, when Raleigh yelled, “Wait!”

Yancy smirked.

Turning back, he look at Raleigh questioningly.

“Yes?”

Raleigh sighed, scrubbing his face with his hands. “Do we have to talk about why I’m upset?” he pleaded, unwilling to tell his brother he felt inadequate next to him, “Can’t we just skip to the cheering up part of the night?”

“I suppose we don’t have talk about it now.” Yancy conceded, “But I’ll beat it out of you eventually.”

Taking the temporary reprieve for the gift it was, Raleigh bounded up and joined Yancy.

“Well what are you waiting for, Old man? Let’s go!”

“Don’t call me old, kiddo!”

* * *

  
_Sometimes being a brother is even better than being a superhero._   
_\- Marc Brown_

* * *

_  
_


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brothers can be best of friends, rivals and have the ability to hurt each other the most. Raleigh and Yancy are no different, but were lucky in the sense that the drift insured they came together instead of falling apart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the second chapter! Some of this is based off the brief back story that was provided for the Becket brothers.

* * *

 

_Being pretty on the inside means you don't hit your brother and you eat all your peas - that's what my grandma taught me._   
_\- Lord Chesterfield_

* * *

The first time the Beckett brothers had trouble staying synced during a drift was, somewhat predicably, because of a girl.

It happened a week after they had met a young woman named Naomi at a bar in the town. To Yancy, at least, it was instantly apparent that she was a Jaegar pilot groupie.

But she was attractive, and Raleigh seemed to like her so he didn’t say anything when they all got to talking. Throughout the night it had become increasingly obvious that she was only interested in hearing stories about their training, about being Jaegar pilots.

At the end of the night, she wrote her phone number on Raleigh’s hand. The action had made Yancy's skin prickle with foreboding.

From the flush on his face Yancy knew the kid was pleased about it, but Yancy wasn’t so trusting.

As a result, he took great care to memorize her phone number. He had absolutely no intention of letting a woman like that get her claws into his little brother.

It all went to hell when Raleigh caught a glimpse of Yancy meeting up with Naomi.

Curious, Raleigh had been unable to resist chasing the R.A.B.B.I.T. and to compound the problem they were pulled from the drift by the concerned techs before he could see the scene play out.

_It was the same bar they'd first met her in, only now it was daylight so the stains and general run-downedness was more readily apparent than it had been previously. Shocked at the difference, Raleigh's eyes scanned the battered wall, the cracked lights, and the dusty and dirty windows._

_He couldn't believe this was the same place._

_Unnerringly, his vision caught sight of his brother stepping into the bar. Judging by his clothes, jeans and one of his favorite sweaters, this was last tuesday when they'd been given the afternoon off._

_Raleigh watched with a frown as Yancy approached Naomi, alerting her to his presence with a hand on her shoulder._

_She turned around with a bright smile on her face._

_'Yancy? I thought Raleigh was the one coming?'_

_'No...'_

_  
_Raleigh didn't get tp hear or see anymore as they were manually pulled from the drift.

He dropped to the ground, pulling the helmet off.

"Raliegh?" Yancy ventured tentatively, brushing his shoulder with his hand.

But Raleigh brushed him off, glared, and stormed out.

Worried, Yancy scrambled to follow him.

“What the hell, Yancey?” Raleigh yelled as soon as they were alone, “You couldn’t let me be the one to get the girl? Just this _once?”_

Yancy winced, glancing up and down the hallway, silently relieved to find no one was around to hear.

“Rals…” He tried, “I can explain!”

Raleigh wasn't been in the mood to listen, "I don't want to hear it! Just leave me alone, Yancy!"

Thus had begun their biggest fight to date.

* * *

 

Later that night, Yancy finally managed to track down Raleigh in a run-down bar at the edge of Anchorage.

It wasn't the same one as before, in fact it was on the complete other side of town.

Somehow Yancy didn't think that was a coincidence.

This one was in no better shape than the last, but it didn't take long to spot Raleigh in the crowd. He was leaning against the bar, a glass in his hand.

Swallowing his apprehension, Yancy approached him.

"Raleigh?"

Yancy watched as his brother's head jerked up, and turned to face him. Inwardly Yancy winced at the sight of him. 

Raleigh's eyes were clouded, his jaw tight, with anger hovering in every inch of frame. 

"Didn't i ask you to leave it be?" Raleigh demanded, slurring slightly.

It was clear that he was well on his  way to being drunk, if he wasn't already there.

Sighing Yancy gripped Raleigh's shoulder and attempted to steer him out of the bar, "Let's just go home, we'll talk in the morning."

They hadn't made it more than two feet when Raleigh's mind caught up with his body.

With little to no warning, he turned on is heel and punched Yancy.

Unfortunately, Yancy was knocked back into a table full of rather burly men. He'd sloshed their drinks all over them, and ruined their mood.

As a result, the whole bar quickly descended into the chaos apparent in any good bar fight.

Somewhere in the middle of it, Raleigh and Yancy ended up back-to-back fighting off their drunken attackers.

"This doesn't mean we're good," Raleigh yelled over the fight, "Just means i didn't wan't to have to carry your beat-up ass home."

Yancy just laughed, adrenaline coursing through his veins.

It had taken Stacker Pentecost intervening to break it up.

"What the hell is this?!"

* * *

 

Which led them to where they were now.

“I can’t believe you two idiots.” Pentecost said, shaking his head as he surveyed the two, taking stock of their injuries. 

Luckily, it seemed to be mostly cuts and bruises with no broken bones.

The brothers were somewhat cleaned up now having borrowed the bar's first aid-kit. Yancy was icing his hand while Raleigh nursed his bloody nose.

Around them the bar was closing, the workers moving around them cleaning the tables and sweeping up the glass left over from the fight.

“You need to sort yourselves out. Tonight. If you bring this into the drift tomorrow I’ll kick you out of the program.” Pentecost threatened turning on his heel and sweeping out of the bar, leaving them to it.

He fully expected them to be back in fighting form tomorrow.

Yancy sighed, “Will you listen to me now?”

Raleigh didn’t say anything but he didn’t try to leave or throw a punch so Yancy took that as a sign to continue.

“She was a groupie, Rals.” He sighed gustily, “She was only interested because we’re up and coming Jaegar pilots.”

Casting a disbelieving look at his brother, Raleigh snorted.

“If you thought that, why’d you meet up with her?”

“To protect you, you idiot!” Yancy roared, finally losing his patience, “You didn’t see the whole thing. We met up, and I warned her off! I wasn’t trying to date her!”

Raleigh stared.

Running his fingers through his hair, Yancy winced when he inadvertently pulled at one of his cuts from the previous fight.

“I was just trying to protect you.” He repeated quietly.

Raleigh leaned forward, bracing himself on the table. Cautiously he reached out to place a hand on Yancy’s forearm.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have jumped to conclusions… I just.” Raleigh sighed, feeling like the idiot Yancy called him. “I really liked her. I thought she was genuinely interested.”

Yancy smiled, “I know, Little Brother. I know. That’s why I did it.”

* * *

 

 

_There's no other love like the love for a brother. There's no other love like the love from a brother._   
_\- Astrid Alauda_

* * *


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the 3rd chapter, Enjoy! :)
> 
> Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by Warner Bros Pictures and Legendary Pictures’ Pacific Rim. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.

* * *

 

  
_When brothers agree, no fortress is so strong as their common life._   
__\- Antisthenes_ _

* * *

Raleigh would never admit it, but he looked up to his older brother. Yancy had been his role model for most of his life.

Their dad had mentally checked out after their mom died and as a result Yancy had practically raised him.

Even before their mom died, Yancy had been the one Raliegh ran to when he'd had a nightmare or when he'd fallen and scraped his knees (something that was painfully frequent in Raleigh's childhood).

Its what made their relationship so complicated, because for as long as he could remember Yancy had been brother and parent both.

But it also made them closer than most other siblings.

So when Yancy mentioned forgoing school to join the Jaegar program?

It was a natural conclusion that Raleigh was doing it too.

For as long as he could remember Raleigh had wanted to be like his brother, wanted to do what he did, play the same sports, everything.

When they were little and Yancy was running and playing with his friends, Raleigh would toddle around behind him, trying his hardest to keep up even though his legs were much shorter.

Often he ended up tripping because of it. But always, _always_ , Yancy would turn around and laugh and come back to help Raleigh up.

So yeah, Raleigh would never willingly admit it to anyone (especially Yancy) but he’d had a serious case of hero worship for Yancy when they were kids.

In Raleigh’s eyes, Yancy could do no wrong.

It was why condemnation from his brother always stung that much more.

“What were you thinking, Raleigh?” Yancy asked, exasperated and annoyed. He waved his arms in the air for emphasis, his movements choppy with anger.

Raleigh shrugged, unable to meet his eyes.

Yancy growled, “You deviated from the plan! What the hell? We wouldn’t have almost lost if you had just done what you were supposed to!”

“We still won.” Raleigh pointed out tiredly,  with no real heart behind it.

“But the Jaegar was almost destroyed! Gipsy is going to need serious repair,” Yancy reminded him, “The Conn-Pad was almost compromised by the Kaiju blood!”

Raleigh sighed gustily, “You didn’t back me up.” He told him hollowly, running his fingers through his hair and making it stand on end “You usually do when I do something crazy.”

Surprised by that choice of comeback, Yancy took a moment to really look at his brother.

Raleigh was the picture of defeat: shoulders slumped, head bowed low and there was an exhausted vibe coming off him.

Even out of the drift Yancy could pick up on Raleigh, had a connection with him that went past what was considered normal.

No matter where they were he was always aware of where Raleigh was in comparison to him and when he tried, he could get a feel for Raleigh’s emotions.

They’d been told it’d get stronger as they drifted more, but for now? Now, it was enough for Yancy to realize he was hurting his little brother.

That taking his anger out on Raleigh, for all that Yancy felt he deserved it, was doing more harm than good.

Yancy was painfuly aware of how much Raleigh looked up to him, and the weight of that expectation followed him even now. 

HIs brother never saw his faults, and it just made Yancy try all the harder to not  _have_ any.

“I… You’re right, I backed out at the last second. Maybe if I’d followed through...” Yancey conceded, “This is my fault too. Raliegh, we’re a team. We lose and we win together.”

Raleigh’s head jerked up, “So, we’re okay?”

“We’re okay.” Yancy agreed, grabbing Raleigh in a choke hold and ruffling his hair.

“ _Yancy_!”

* * *

 

  
_The highlight of my childhood was making my brother laugh so hard that food came out his nose._   
__\- Garrison Keillor_ _

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was a little shorter than i wanted, but the ending just seemed to work. Feedback is always appreciated!


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brothers can be best of friends, rivals and have the ability to hurt each other the most. Raleigh and Yancy are no different, but were lucky in the sense that the drift insured they came together instead of falling apart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The fourth chapter of this story, which is in fact my first real attempt at a story that wasn't meant to just be a one-shot. I hope everyone enjoys it as much as i have. Only one more chapter!
> 
> Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by Warner Bros Pictures and Legendary Pictures’ Pacific Rim. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.

 

* * *

_He aint heavy, he's my brother._   
__\- Neil Diamond_ _

* * *

Being a Jaegar pilot was stressful, knowing that everything depended on them and that the world’s survival hinged on their decisions was something that neither of the Becket brothers would ever be able to describe adequately.

Every second of every day it hung over them. 

It always seemed to be hanging over their heads, they were always sitting at the edge of their seats waiting for the next time the alarms went off. The next time they had to climb in their Jaegar and go fight the newest Kaiju.

While neither would ever take back their decision to be pilots, it weighed on them some days. It tainted their moods, and their lives.

After their second battle they both agreed to stop drinking because the last time the alarms went off they'd both been tipsy. They had been lucky in that they weren't the team called on.

But they could have been.

So that night they both swore off drinking, they had to find other ways let off steam and relieve their stress.

They couldn’t risk that they wouldn’t be at the top of their game next time they were called upon.

It took a while for them to settle on one thing that worked for them both.

They started drinking coffee instead of alcohol, tried exercising for stress relief, tried playing video games or reading about anything other than the Kaiju.

But everything in their lives always came back to the war, because neither of them could imagine doing anything else.

In the end none of the techniques worked.

Until they got back into sparring.

Sparring was a throwback to their academy days, back then it had been a drill to test and augment their compatibility but now it was the only stress relief they'd found that worked.

When they stood on a mat, across from each other it was like nothing else in the world.

Their breathing synchronized, and the world narrowed down until it was just them. The only thing that existed was them.

It was easily the most relaxing thing they’d ever done, the only thing they had to focus on was them, and the moves they both knew were going to happen as if it had been choreographed.

Raleigh didn’t know about Yancy, but for him it felt like everything was falling into place.

And in the end it worked so well that they began to spend all their free time sparring.

Which is why they weren't really surprised that Raleigh and Yancy were sparring hand to hand when it happened.

“Hey! You two! Yes, you!” Someone yelled, breaking through the audience that habitually came to watch them spar. 

For all that it was a frequent occurrence people always seemed to be fascinated by their spars, or at least thought it was decent entertainment.

The viewers ranged from aspiring pilots to people just taking bets on the fight.

Exchanging a glance the brothers relaxed their stances and turned to face their interrupter.

“Tendo?” Yancy asked, eyes widened incredulously. It was unusual to see the tech outside of either the labs or the mess hall.

The crowd, sensing that the show was over, grumbled disagreeably and began to disperse.

Tendo seemed to almost be bouncing with excitement as he spoke, “We finally have a room open! I know you’ve been bunking together while HR beat around the bush, but now that you’re actually full-fledged pilots, the requisitions office decided to get off their asses so you can have your own rooms."

Blinking in surprise Raleigh questioned, “What?”

But Tendo continued on as if he hadn’t spoken, “I mean your argument last week was the source of all the water cooler gossip! And Pentecost figured you were just having too much of each other so he bullied everyone into fixing it so you’d have separate rooms.”

Yancy glanced at Raleigh, feeling rather uncomfortable and was pleased to see Raleigh had similar look of panic on his face.

“NO!” They chorused (A phenomena that was becoming more and more common the more they drifted). 

They spoke at the same time at least once a day now, they had even become those obnoxiously annoying people who finished the other’s sentences.

Tendo jumped and his brows furrowed, surprised at the outburst.

Raleigh instantly felt bad, “Sorry,” he offered.

“But we’re fine the way we are,” Yancy finished decisively.

Tendo couldn’t quite believe his ears, “Seriously? You practically live out of each other pockets’! And you’re telling me neither of you want space?”

“No, I don't.” Yancy said decisively, “How 'bout you, Raleigh?”

Raleigh sent a scathing look his brother’s way, “Do you even have to ask?”

Then he turned back to Tendo, “Really, we’re fine sharing. Done it our whole lives without seriously maiming each other, give the room to someone else.”

Tendo stared. “Seriously?”

Both brothers nodded, looking (in Tendo’s mind) unfairly amused at his bewilderment.

Finally Tendo gave up and threw his hands up in the air, “Fine! Have it your way.” He groused good-naturedly.

Yancy snickered, watching bemused as Tendo dramatically made his exit.

Tearing his eyes away, he wasn’t surprised to see Raleigh grinning at him wolfishly, “Ready to eat the mat again, Yancy?”

“In your dreams.” Yancy retorted, simultaneously dropping down to kick Raleigh’s feet out from under him.

At the last second Raleigh jumped so that Yancy’s foot missed him entirely, “Gotta try harder than that Yance.” He teased.

The taunt began another spar, another dance between them.

It wasn't the first time someone brought up them getting space, people continued to try and encourage them to separate.

Their parents had tried when they were younger, encouraging them to play different sports or have separate hobbies.

It all changed they day the first Kaiju attacked. Every other problem seemed petty in comparison.

But after the first couple years it was common enough knowledge that people eventually stopped bringing it up.

They were never really separated until that fateful day when they met Knifehead.

* * *

 

_“Forever and ever, kid, until you're sick and tired of seeing me.”_   
__― Marie Lu, Legend_ _

* * *

 


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The ending of the story. Hopefully i wrap it up well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, i know this took a while to come out. In my defense i started college two weeks ago and moving in and starting classes took up a lot of my time. Also, this chapter was just really hard for me to write. I just didn't want to kill off Yancy :(. Anyway i hope you enjoy this last chapter.
> 
> Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by Warner Bros Pictures and Legendary Pictures’ Pacific Rim. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.

 

* * *

  
_“If all else perished, and he remained, I should still continue to be; and if all else remained, and he were annihilated, the universe would turn to a mighty stranger.”_   
__― Emily Brontë, Wuthering Heights_ _

* * *

He’d gotten cocky.

In reality they all had.

The Jaegars had been doing so well, defeating the Kaiju consistently in the last year. It had gotten to the point where the world was becoming cautiously optimistic.

Maybe they hadn’t stopped the attacks, but clearly they had an effective defense against it.

Places had begun to rebuild and prosper, people stopped jumping every time there was a sighting in the water.

So, of course, that was when everything had gone wrong.

For Raleigh in particular, things had gone very wrong. Irrevocably changing his life wrong.

Every time he closed his eyes he remembered, felt the pain that wasn’t his again and again.

He would never forget the gripping fear he’d felt then, so mixed with Yancy’s that he couldn’t tell what was his and what wasn’t.

It had created a feedback loop of fear and pain, feeding off each other and making things worse. 

“Mr. Becket.” A voice behind him spoke, startling the last living Becket from his thoughts.

If it had been anyone else Raleigh would likely have ignored them. But it was Stacker, and no one ignored him.

Turning around, he warily eyed the much bigger man, “Sir?”

The Marshal sighed, suddenly looking much older to Raleigh’s own world-weary eyes. “It’s time.”

Raleigh didn’t have to be told twice, and inwardly he flinched.

Outwardly though he nodded, readjusted his sling so his injured arm was cradled closer to him and gestured for Stacker to lead the way.

The unlikely pair walked solemnly through the Anchorage Shatterdome, ignoring the sympathetic and pitying looks sent their way.

“What are you going to do now?” Pentecost questioned, his voice deceptively casual.

Raleigh shrugged, “You and me both know I can’t drift anymore,” he pointed out, “I’m damaged goods.”

Shaking his head, Stacker grimaced at the bitterness suffusing what had once been a young, carefree, and bold young man.

He’d always been the positive and energetic one, while Yancy had played the part of long-suffering brother who, in reality, enjoyed it.

As they neared their destination, they both fell silent. Stepping outside the hangar to the deck, Raleigh had to pause for a moment and rested his good hand against the wall as he steeled his nerves.

This would make everything real, and final in every sense of the word.

For the event that had been creeping up on Raleigh all day was none other than Yancy’s funeral.

Stacker didn’t say anything, just stood beside him as he battled his demons.

_Come on Rals, its easy. Just one step after another…_ Yancy’s voice whispered in his mind, at once settling Raleigh’s nerves and setting him on edge.

Sometimes when Raleigh was feeling particularly maudlin, he would entertain the idea that the voice was really Yancy, that some part of him survived through the drift and continued to live on in Raleigh.

But the practical part of him knew it was just his brain calling on memories. This particular phrase was from when a much younger Yancy had been trying to teach the baby Raleigh to walk.

Shelving the memory for later, Raleigh took several deep breaths and tried to order his increasingly chaotic mind.

The doctors said he had brain damage, and that he may never regain full use of his arm.

None of that seemed important at all when compared to the fact the he was alone. He felt like he’d lost a limb, hell, like he’d lost all his limbs.

He wasn’t whole without Yancy.

“Raleigh?” Stacker asked, once again dragging him back to the present.

Shaking his head as if to knock the jumble of thoughts out of his mind, Raleigh smiled apologetically, “Let’s just get this over with.”

“Agreed.” Stacker said, clapping him on the shoulder. It jarred Raleigh’s injuries, but the pain focused him.

Once again walking together, the two stepped out into the sunlight and towards the crowd waiting for him.

Raleigh blinked at the sudden flashing of lights, because of course there was no way the press wouldn’t be there for the funeral of one of the famous Becket brothers.

Judging by the way Stacker’s jaw clenched, he wasn’t happy about it either.

But this wasn’t for them, any of them. Raising his head high, Raleigh pushed through them while ignoring the various mics and cameras shoved at him.

When he got to the crowd waiting by the edge of the deck, they moved out of his way for they weren't the press or public gawkers. They were mechanics and technicians and trainees, all of whom had lived and worked with Yancy and Raleigh.

Several came forward to shake his hand, or to pull him into a hug. Later though he wouldn’t remember this part as much more than a blur.

Reaching the front, Raleigh stuttered to a stop. There was an array of flowers set up but what startled Raleigh was the large portrait set up.

It was a good picture of Yancy, it had caught one of his rare carefree smiles. Yancy had always been more subdued with his genuine emotions. Only really letting his walls down around those he trusted implicitly.

Raleigh was there too (really there weren’t many pictures of either of them without the other, Raleigh mused nostalically).

Yancy’s arm was around his shoulders and judging by the scowl on his face and way his hair was messed up Raleigh knew this picture had been taken right after Yancy had messed up his hair.

For a moment the picture took his breath away, reminding him of better times while at once reminding him of what he lost. It was staggering.

A hand gripped his elbow, and he turned to see Tendo had stepped up to join him and Stacker. Tendo had long ago adopted the Becket brothers as _his_ pilots.

Even when they were deployed to other Shatterdomes, Tendo came along.

After Raleigh, he was probably the one hurting the most.

With this in mind Raleigh didn’t shake off his hand as he had so many others in recent days. Instead he reached up with his good hand and gripped Tendo's in turn. And if his grip was a little to tight, if he was cutting off Tendo's circualtion, he never said a word.

Naturally, they didn’t have a body to bury or any such thing. It had become tradition with Jaegar pilots to hold a vigil on the deck of their Shatterdome.

Raleigh knew that everyone here had candles, ready to light them when it grew dark. But for now they all stood watching the sunset.

Some of the braver souls told stories, of Yancy’s skills and of his goodness.

At some point they broke out flasks of alcohol to pass around and slowly the candles were lit as the night wore on.

Through it all Raleigh remained silent, eyes unseeing as he stared forward, reliving his own memories of Yancy.

The good and the bad, the sweet and funny. For Raleigh, Yancy had always been there. He couldn’t remember a time when Yancy wasn’t by his side.

Even now, he felt Yancy there as if he was just out of sight.

The entire time, he listened with half an ear to the stories being told. But he didn’t cry, because Becket men didn’t cry.

And if they did, it certainly wasn’t going to happen in front of so many people. Especially not when there were reporters still hanging around the edges like vultures.

So he stood there stoically, first watching the sunset and then the moon rise. Listening as the stories grew fewer and quieter. Till finally the sun rose.

Everyone remained there until it was fully risen.

And then and only then, did everyone begin to leave. Some to get some sleep, others to start their shifts.

Soon only Raleigh, Stacker, and Tendo remained.

Eventually Stacker’s Marshall Duties pulled him away, and with one last clap on the shoulder and a solem 'Good luck' he was gone.

Tendo didn’t say anything just slipped a piece of paper into Raleigh’s hand. Then he too walked away, leaving Raleigh alone.

It took a few minutes for Raleigh to return to himself and think clearly and when he did he looked at the paper Tendo had left him.

On it was a phone number, with _if you need anything_ scrawled under it.

Carefully, Raleigh tucked the paper into his pocket.

That very day Raleigh packed a bag, jumped into their Dad’s old truck, and left without a backwards glance with only Yancy’s ghost for company.

* * *

 

_“Where you used to be, there is a hole in the world, which I find myself constantly walking around in the daytime, and falling in at night. I miss you like hell.”_   
__― Edna St. Vincent Millay_ _

* * *

 


End file.
